Friday, October 10, 2008

When Did it Get so Complicated?

I've been pondering this subject for a while now and I thought I'd get the opinion of the two of you who actually comment. I'd love for others to chime in, too.

Last night I went to a birthday party for one of L's friends. Technically, our families are friends so we were all invited even though he's L's age and they have gymnastics together. And we all went, all five of us. I noticed that many of the kids there were not this boy's age but all ages and the parents stayed, too. Some of the older kids were neighbors who play with the birthday boy on a daily basis but there were others who were siblings of his friends as well. In fact it was mostly families who attended the birthday party for a 4-year-old.

I don't remember inviting whole families to my birthday parties. I remember my friends being there but not the whole family. Granted, I was an only child so I didn't have siblings who might want friends there, too, but I don't remember being invited to my friend's sibling's birthday parties either. When we had K's birthday party last year we invited her friends. Not all the siblings; just her friends as it was her party.

So when did it come to this? When did children's parties become parties for the whole family? Does this go along with our society's need to include everyone? That everyone must win, everybody gets the prize? Is it that we don't want to hurt anyone's feelings? Or is it that we now feel obligated to include everyone? I just don't get it.

I'm not saying that it's a bad idea. In some ways, it's a wonderful way to celebrate with family and friends, all of our friends. K and H had a fantastic time and I even jumped in there with them, having races with several kids. It was fun and we all had a blast. Everyone was exhausted when we got home and went to bed right away. (Kudos to my friend who had the party from 5-7 on a weeknight rather than a Saturday. I will keep this in mind for L's party next year.)

What are your thoughts?

1 comment:

Christian - Modobject@Home said...

Hmmmm, I hadn't really thought about until now and can't really voice much based on my own birthday party hosting experience (b/c we haven't really jumped on the b'day party bandwagon) but here are my thoughts...

I remember being little and it being a BIG DEAL to me when I could attend a party without my mom staying too. So, part of what you are describing, I think, just has to do with the ages of our children -- they're still young and are just now reaching the point of being old enough to "drop them off" for a party.

I think the family parties tend to happen when there are kids (siblings included) who play together often, and when the parents are friends. Again, probably as our kids get older and start having a wider circle of friends we'll see less of the family event parties.

I remember, as a child being allowed to invite one friend to be my companion at my sister's parties. Make sense?

But, yes, I agree with you there does seem to be more family oriented celebrating going on, but I think we'll see it diminish as time goes by.